I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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