But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize