All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
