no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize