Texts From Last Night

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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.

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  (402): What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho. http://tfl.nu/a5a8
  Replies (43) Good night (5334) Bad night (973)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  This house was built for laser tag.

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  (336): This house was built for laser tag. http://tfl.nu/32ag
  Replies (14) Good night (9033) Bad night (719)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.

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  (484): We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision. http://tfl.nu/lzhl
  Replies (18) Good night (1256) Bad night (3740)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.

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  (917): i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past. http://tfl.nu/eita
  Replies (4) Good night (2534) Bad night (1797)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,

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  (412): Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage, http://tfl.nu/ten2
  Replies (15) Good night (4642) Bad night (970)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.

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  (253): I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight. http://tfl.nu/gw0c
  Replies (4) Good night (2023) Bad night (667)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.

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  (641): yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors. http://tfl.nu/lgo5
  Replies (4) Good night (1720) Bad night (1253)
• Favorite

  (478): View more from Georgia

  Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!

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  (478): Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink! http://tfl.nu/6ksq
  Replies (10) Good night (1020) Bad night (909)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.

  (646): View more from New York

  LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES

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  (407): I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair. (646): LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES http://tfl.nu/6j0d
  Replies (6) Good night (1224) Bad night (522)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.

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  (850): That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving. http://tfl.nu/fvqq
  Replies (6) Good night (1451) Bad night (380)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me

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  (614): Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me http://tfl.nu/x6xk
  Replies (5) Good night (1082) Bad night (382)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.

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  (954): He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants. http://tfl.nu/tg9t
  Replies (3) Good night (1178) Bad night (281)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.

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  (631): Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds. http://tfl.nu/5z67
  Replies (0) Good night (704) Bad night (264)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.

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  (902): I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants. http://tfl.nu/7sqj
  Replies (0) Good night (598) Bad night (260)
• Favorite

  (447): View more from

  She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.

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  (447): She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases. http://tfl.nu/jvs6
  Replies (5) Good night (312) Bad night (591)

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