I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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