i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
