I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Swine flu is the new snow day.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize