i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
