Whod you bang
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
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after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
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"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
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