out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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