I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
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