Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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