Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize