Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize