eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize