I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
