Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
