You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
