hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I wish i was in the wii world.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
