Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize