Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
