Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
