Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize