How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
