well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I met the friendliest cop last night
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize