Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
