what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize