do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
