Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
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So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
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