you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
