You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
you didnt know i had herpes?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
