C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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