He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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