His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i barfeds in our rink
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
