I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
