i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Guys Hate When Girls Do These 29 Cringeworthy Things
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho