im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
