I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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