Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize