My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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