TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
