Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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