so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
