i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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