You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Randomize
