I think i peed on brittanys purse
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
