I want to stick my p in your. b.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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