I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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