Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
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