I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
