I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Randomize
